


An Early Frost

by Rikerbabe



Series: Seasons Change [1]
Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Age Difference, Angst, F/M, Regret, Second Chances, end of life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-16
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-09 04:50:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 15,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7787419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rikerbabe/pseuds/Rikerbabe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will Riker is nearing the end of a life well lived but tinged with regrets. He is still mourning the loss of Jean-Luc and now the loss of his eldest son. After his symptoms of PTSD returns, he meets up with someone who might be able to help him if he will only open up not only his soul but his heart.  Can Lynn help him to finally heal and discover love again?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [miloowen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/miloowen/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The Sound of Wind and Sea](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3662064) by [miloowen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/miloowen/pseuds/miloowen). 



> My take on what might happen after the death of Jean-Luc and Sacha...The chance to heal and let go of all the emotions that Will has bottled up inside after losing both of them.

The diagnosis hadn't been good and Will was in no mood for being told. It had only been twenty years since he lost his husband, Jean-Luc to his illness. The strain on him had been great, and the years since losing him also hadn't been kind. Word reached him about the loss of the _Titan_ with all hands a few months before this diagnosis. Will had grieved over the loss of his former First Officer, Christine Vale, and the rest of the crew. By becoming an Admiral he had retained _Titan_ as his personal flagship and was planning on taking her out on a rather routine assignment, just to get away from Earth, and the memories of Jean-Luc for a few weeks. By a rather tragic chain of events, their eldest son Sacha had transferred aboard _Titan_ to serve as her chief helmsman for a training exercise. Will hadn't been told of his transfer until two weeks before the ship and crew was lost. Starfleet Command didn't know why and when he asked if he could help with finding out, they had rather abruptly told Riker that they had an investigation underway and didn't need his help.

Will hadn't taken the cold shoulder from the upper Admiralty all too well and they had shoved him several other assignments that were better handled by the Diplomatic Corps rather than him. But he took on the work, finally understanding that they were more concerned about keeping him busy while they tried to find the answers. Admiral Akaar had made sure that he would also informed as to the team's progress, knowing all too well that Will would make a fuss if he wasn't told about the findings. Losing a child was never easy, no matter if you were an admiral, a crew member or a civilian, it hurt just the same. Akaar knew this first hand, losing two of his own children years earlier.

The illness had started out rather quietly, with him feeling light-headed and weak some mornings. Will had rather ignored the symptoms, chalking it up to stress and overwork, something he rather remembered from his days on the _Enterprise-D_ as her First Officer. But when the symptoms kept coming back morning after morning, he finally went to see one of the starbase physicians who poked and prodded him until he was sore just about all over. After being told it would be a day or two before the results came in, Will had been sent home for a few days of rest and forbidden to do anything strenuous until further notice. Grumbling a bit, he went back to his apartment near Starfleet HQ and proceeded to wait. His apartment was on the 89th floor of the south tower, which was reserved for those of Fleet Captains and above. It was rumored that Akaar had one here, but on a higher level. 

Upon entering the apartment, the unit consisted of four bedrooms, one of which was his music studio, and a huge kitchen area. The living room had a breathtaking view of the Bay and one could see for miles beyond it. Will had tastefully decorated it with replicated jazz album covers that were framed and on the wall near the fireplace that he never used. Photos of the kids along with the few wedding photos of himself and Jean-Luc were on the mantle. The kids hardly ever visited, with Rose and her family stationed on a starbase near Betazed and the youngest one, Jean-Guy, on tour with his classical music group near Andor. Will never remarried after losing Jean-Luc, and never sought any company male or female during those twenty years. There had been a few people who had inquired rather discreetly about him, but Will had not been interested. He had kept up with a few of their fellow crew members, but naturally time had caught up with some of them. Geordi had been injured in an accident at Utopia Planentia, which had killed his wife Leah Brahms, and he later died of his injuries. Deanna had married, but lost her husband to a case of Rigillian fever and then she died six months later after him. Worf had been killed in battle six years after Will married Jean-Luc, and Beverly was lost with her ship near the Neutral Zone from a Romulan mine left over from a brief skirmish ten years ago. But Data was the one that still survived out of all the others. Will never contacted him, but kept up with him through others.

William kept the curtains closed, and the rooms in semi-darkness, which helped when he felt dizzy. He had started to skip lunch and ate very little at dinner. Most of the time he would work on a few jazz pieces or just relax by listening to Miles Davis or Nat King Cole. Perhaps the doctor would fuss at him for missing lunch and being over worked at that would be it. Will entered his apartment and locked the door behind him. Walking over to one of the couches, he dropped the data pads onto the coffee table there and took a deep breath. The silence of the place was deafening and the emptiness of it depressed him further. Dropping onto the couch, he leaned back and closed his eyes, trying to push the sadness he felt away. Will had to force himself to function at a normal level, whatever the hell that was, and many noticed that his laughter was more quieter than it used to be. His moods were touchy at best, and his aide was unsure from day-to-day about how to deal with it. 

Will finally gave in to the tears that were forming behind his eyes and allowed himself to cry quietly, not just for Jean-Luc, but for the Titan and their son. It was going to be a long time before he would be able to talk about any of them again. The ache of wanting to hold Jean-Luc again was tearing him apart. All of his life he had been made to feel unloved, unwanted by anyone and to finally find that someone who could see past the scars and the pain left there by his manipulative father had been cruelly taken from him. His eldest son who was just starting out his life and career had been lost to an accident, and the fear that his other two children would also leave him was there to haunt his dreams. Jean-Luc would have chided him to keep active, but Will wouldn't have taken the advice easily. How he hated growing old, and being alone once more. Will wiped the tears and sat up, feeling his age in his bones. Rising from the couch he walked over to the bay window and stared out at the sea, which was a pale blue-green color. There was a few humpback whales that was cresting, and usually the sight of them made him long for his native Alaska, but not now. “It's just a bad case of depression, that's all.” he said, rather quietly. “I'm just getting too old to keep this up. I'm tired of everything.” The old feelings of disconnecting from everything was returning, and he was allowing them to take root once again in his soul. None of his therapists were alive to help him again, and he wasn't about to seek anyone out to help this time.

Turning away from the window he went over to the replicator and punched in the code for a plate of lasagna, hoping that he would find out what was wrong and return back to duty quickly. Sitting down in the kitchen, he quietly ate and cleaned up, as was his custom to leave everything spotless. Will went into the office and sat behind the desk, hoping that he would be able to do some work before he retired for another long, lonely night. Sleeping wasn't getting any easier for him and the quality of his sleep was very poor. Some nights he would wake, reaching for Jean-Luc and realizing that he would never be there at his side again. Then the tears would come and he would weep for an hour or more. 

Booting up his terminal, he saw the few messages that had been sent to him by various people, including the Starbase doctor. Opening that message, he found that the doctor wanted him in her office at 1400 hours tomorrow afternoon. He sighed and closed the message, turning towards the window that looked out over the main tower of Starfleet Command Headquarters. “Stress....that's all it is. She'll tell me to slow down at my age, and shake his head at me for not retiring ten years ago.” he said, staring at the tower. Of course his age would be taken into consideration being that he was close to 110 and a bit unable to keep up with those that were a bit younger on the Admiralty Board. “No one is going to force me to retire....I'll be damned if I'm going to allow _THAT_ “ he grumbled, rising to his feet. With that, Will left the office and decided to turn in for the night.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lynn starts to develop a treatment plan for Will, but first he needs to tell her about the incident on the Enterprise-D and the truth about the sketchy reports filed by Beverly Crusher and Alasdair McBride about his PTSD and suicide attempt. Will finally begins to open up to her and they start to develop a working Doctor-Patient relationship that could lead to something else entirely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He's attracted to her, and she is slowly starting to realize that she's attracted to him too. It's hard to open up to someone new and I know that first hand. Will they develop beyond a simple doctor patient relationship? Only my muses know......
> 
> At any rate, enjoy!

Dr. Lynn Hawthorne sighed and put the padd she was reading down. Admiral Riker's symptoms were complex and disturbing. For someone who was close to 110, he shouldn't be experiencing this early in the course of the disease. There was something else that concerned her, but she just couldn't put her finger on it. Turning back to her terminal, she called up his health records and started the enormous task of scrolling through it all before the appointment this afternoon. After an hour's worth of work, she really didn't find much to explain his symptoms but she kept on reading. Taking a break, she glanced over and saw it was getting close to lunch, the time she usually ate with Daniel from Microbiology. He had been seeing her for a few months and while she liked the attention, she felt confined. Long-term relationships really didn't go well with her, as she often found out. Contacting Microbiology, Lynn left word that she wouldn't be available to have lunch with Daniel today and settled in to read through the Admiral's health records again.

Will was in a grumpy mood as he waded through the endless supply requests, ship assignments and the other day-to day affairs of his office. His aide reminded him of the appointment and he was glad in a way to be able to leave the office for an hour or two, knowing his aide would welcome the peace and calm that came with it. Leaving the office, he went down to the main promenade In hopes of finding a nice quiet corner in one of the various restaurants for lunch. After walking a bit, he found a Vulcan-run establishment known for their non-meat dishes. Will entered and found a corner table where he could sit in semi-darkness and relax for a bit. The occupants of the tables he passed were full aware of who he was and that made him feel a bit uneasy. “That's the hero of Wolf-359....you know, when the Borg tried to take over the Federation...” he heard as he passed one table. Will choose to ignore the whispers and the glances in his direction as he sat down. One of the waiters came and he gave his order for a plate of meatless spaghetti and some water. Nodding, the waiter left and Will glanced out the window onto the huge space-dock.

Lynn finally finished reading the rather enormous report files on Riker and leaned back in her chair. Nothing in his file made her job any easier, and it didn't bother her too much, since she dealt with cases far difficult than his before. She reflected on his coming in yesterday and how uneasy he looked. _If only he was put at ease..perhaps I can find out what's wrong with him. He just doesn't like talking with doctors, that I can see, but why?_ she thought, a frown crossing her face. A thought came to her and she quickly ran through his psych profile and hoped an answer might be there. An half-hour later, she found what she needed to know and it mildly shocked her. He had attempted suicide at one point, but the reasons were a bit unclear in the report. The report had been filed by one of her early Med School instructors, Beverly Crusher, and it gave just enough information but not a full clear picture. Now she thought about how that would affect any treatment plan that would be enacted. Something else started to bother her and she read more of his profile and found that he had been treated by Alasdair McBride for PTSD. Of course! That would make several things clearer...but how to get to open up to her was the problem at the moment. She knew that he would be here in thirty minuets and so she started drawing up a treatment plan to work from. But the problem of getting him to trust her and to open up was still an obstacle to overcome, so she had to tread carefully.

Will left the promenade and headed to Sickbay, wishing that Dr Hawthorne could have just told him in a message what was wrong and left it at that. As the 'lift ascended to Sickbay, he thought about Dr Hawthorne and a slight smile came to him. Will remembered Beverly being that devoted to her training and having the desire to help those who were ill. _She is a rather beautiful woman..If only I was 60 years younger.._ he thought, as the 'life started to slow. _Hell...who am I kidding? Who would want me now?_ Promptly ending that thought, again wishing that he didn't have to see her again over something so stupid as being dizzy. When the 'lift doors opened, he strode down the hall and found her in her office going over something on her terminal screen. Lynn looked up and smiled, rising to her feet and motioning the Admiral to enter. Her smile caught Will off-guard for a moment and he sat down, rather flustered. It had been over sixty years since a woman smiled like that to him, and it painfully reminded him of Deanna, his _Imzadi_. Will wondered for a moment if this was her daughter, since she had the same mannerisms that Deanna had. But then again, Deanna's daughter was on Betazed and trained as a Psychologist.

Lynn glanced over at her notes as she began talking to Will. “Admiral, your tests came back rather normal for someone of your age however, there are a few questions that I would like to ask you.” She said, watching Will shift rather uneasily in his chair. “What do you want to know, Doc? Everything is in my files, or rather it should be in there.” Will answered, slightly irritated. He hated having to explain the vague reports about his breakdown, the trauma his father had put him through his childhood. She took his whole demeanor in, noticing how defensive he sounded and his body language as a whole. “I'm not asking you to recite your whole medical history, Sir. I just had a few questions of a general nature to ask you. I ask them of all my patients.” Lynn replied, smiling at him. “I understand you are tired of reciting it to every new doctor you meet. Believe me, I have many times been tired of doing it myself. These are general ones, nothing to feel uneasy or embarrassed to answer.”

Will relaxed a bit, much to Lynn's relief. He had been holding himself very tense, and she could see the strain in his eyes, but something else was there as well. It was as if he was tired of holding something back, perhaps not just from her, but from even himself. Lynn tapped on her terminal for a second and looked back at him. “You were under treatment from Dr. Alasdair McBride on the Enterprise-D for about six weeks. The medical reports that were filed by Dr. Crusher were sketchy at best. Do you remember what happened? Before you protest, I must remind you that everything you tell me is confidential and I will in no way inform anyone, including Admiral Akaar about your visit here today.” Will nodded and a brief look of panic crossed his face before he spoke. “I was under treatment for what he later discovered as PTSD. I tried to commit suicide without really knowing I was trying to. It stemmed from the abuse I had suffered by my father, Kyle Riker.” He noted that Lynn didn't regard him as broken, nor did she look at him in some kind of disgust. Perhaps Lynn would be someone he could trust with the story of his past and be one to count on if he needed her help.

Lynn looked thoughtful for a moment, as if she was thinking of another patient who might have told her the same thing. “I'm sorry to hear that, Sir. The report wasn't too clear on several things, but in time I hope you will be comfortable in telling me about it. I'm not going to make you tell it to me now, but in future appointments,I hope you will. How are you sleeping? You did say that your sleep was poor and your moods are shifting much from anger to despair. Your sleep does impact your moods..there are many studies that show this to be true.” “I sleep for about four or five hours at a time, Doc. The dreams are what wake me and after that, I can't go back to sleep.” Will answered Lynn, who nodded. “I could give you a hypo for your sleeplessness, but I would rather try a few other things first.” At that, Will smiled and chuckled softly. “Beverly had me try warm milk and that did help for a night or two.” Lynn nodded, smiling a bit. “Then I want you to try that for at least tonight and perhaps tomorrow night as well. Let me know if that helps or if you need the hypo. Perhaps that might be the remedy for that particular problem. As for the other, I'll need to see what other tests I may need to run. I do want you to continue your exercise program and try to eat. Perhaps not three big meals, but several small ones. I'll make the appropriate adjustments to your dietary program. Is that agreeable to you, Sir?” Will nodded and rose from the chair. “That sounds good, Doc. Thanks for everything.” Lynn rose from behind her desk and walked around it to face him. “I'll make a follow-up for three days from now. Then we can talk further on your results.” She said, motioning to the door and walking him to the corridor. Will left for his office and Lynn watched him enter the 'lift. Turning back into Sickbay she wondered if he really would tell her the whole truth behind the reports from McBride and the Enterprise-D.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lynn comes up with a treatment plan but needs Will to open up to her fully. Both of them are anxious to find out why the PTSD symptoms have returned. Will is still torn about telling her everything, and Lynn wonders if she is able to hear the terrible things that Kyle Riker did to Will so long ago. Slowly they are starting to find that they are attracted to each other. Will sees Lynn as someone he can trust with his heart, Lynn sees him as someone who can give her both the love she has missed out on as well as freedom to be herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy! Let me know what you think....

Will returned to his office and resumed the dreary task of reading the reports and requests that seemed to have multiplied while he was gone. Akaar had made sure to keep him busy, and he gritted his teeth as he plunged into a rather bland report on some star system about to go supernova. His aide had reported that there were still nothing from the investigation of the Titan and that depressed him. All he wanted was answers as to why she had been lost and to try and recover Sacha's body, so that he could be properly buried in Alaska. Sacha had been engaged to a wonderful girl, Janet Patterson, who would never become his bride. Will had contacted her to tell her the tragic news and she had cried. He had grieved that there would never be grandchildren from Sacha, and more than likely, from Jean-Guy. Rose had been the only one to give him grand-kids.

Pausing from the never-ending pile of data padds, his thoughts turned back to Lynn. She was different from some of the others he had known earlier in his life, but she was so like them too. Lynn was quiet and at time shy, but had a slight temper when necessary. He felt that she could be trusted with the truth, but decided to tell her in small bits, so it would be easier for him to talk about it. Will had bottled everything up inside again and now it was causing him to return to his old habits that McBride spent so much time to help him recover from. Shaking his head, he returned to reading the report and soon forgot about Lynn.

Lynn walked back towards her office and entered her notes from her meeting with Will. Her treatment plan was slowly coming together, but she need more information that what he had mentioned. That would take some time for him to tell her, and she wasn't going to rush him with it. Lynn had dealt with PTSD cases before, thanks to the many survivors of the Xindi attack on Starfleet HQ and the Academy. But Will's was so very different from those cases and the scars ran very deep. She had to be very careful or Will might never tell her or anyone else what really happened. There were signs that he might try suicide again if he didn't get help early in the early stages. The thought of him trying made her shudder slightly, because if he tried and survived, he would be placed in a treatment facility and forgotten. Even in the late 24th Century, there were places where a person like him would be put in and little or no treatment would be done.

After finishing up her notes, she made the dietary adjustments in his diet and sent that on to him, along with a follow-up appointment. Her stomach growled and she realized that lunch had all but been forgotten. Shaking her head, she rose from behind her desk and walked over to the replicator intending to grab a quick protein bar and finish up before she went home. A noise at the doorway caught her attention, as three bloody security team members were being brought in. Discarding the need for something to eat, she went quickly into the main treatment area and starting checking out one of the team members. Will and his treatment plan was soon forgotten as she gave orders to one of her nurses for a hypo for the man's pain.

Three hours later Will left his office to return home, having a rather long but interesting day. He had read her dietary changes and put the follow-up appointment in his terminal, with a five-hour reminder. He left the main tower and decided to walk back to his apartment, this thoughts again turning back to Lynn. How he hated when he remembered McBride having Will tell him everything that his father had done to him. _Would she understand if I told her what he did to me? How he would force himself on me by telling me that no one would want me, no one would care about me._ He walked, thinking about those early sessions. McBride had kept asking him to not hold anything back, but to trust him with the truth. Finally being able to trust him, Will told him everything that his father did to him and how he had manipulated Will into believing that was how the rest of the world saw him now and would see him in the future. A cold light rain started to fall as he got closer to the South tower and he hurried inside, not wanting to get too wet.

At the same time, Lynn finished up the notes for her three new patients and returned to her office. Glancing at the chronometer, she saw that it was past her end of shift and felt extremely tired. All day she had patients to see and her appointment with Will drained her. She had never seen such a case of PTSD before and briefly wondered if she should have another one of the doctors handle His case. Shaking her head, she dismissed that thought and nodded to the nurses coming on shift and the ones leaving. Walking out of her office, she quickly told her replacement about the three new cases and the status of Sickbay. With that, Lynn left for her apartment near the center of Old San Francisco and tried not to think about Will.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will and Lynn both reflect on their feelings for one another and are coming to realize that they both need each other in order to heal from wounds that they both have, visible and invisible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took a bit longer than I had hoped to get this chapter finished....but they are even closer to acknowledging their feeling to themselves and each other....

Will entered his apartment and crossed over to the bay window, partly out of habit. The view this time was dreary and gray, much like his thoughts. It seemed the only ray of light was his meeting with Lynn, and that seemed promising. She didn't react when he told her a little of what his father did to him, and to Will it was a good sign. He had kept up his guard again for so long, it was second nature to him now not to trust anyone with the still-shameful secret he had. There was times when he dreamed he was a child again, that Kyle was in his room, telling him that there was no one who would love him and that he would be the only one who cared. Then he would force Will to take him again and again, not caring if he hurt Will or not. _Can I trust her? Will she be repulsed by the truth?_ he thought, gazing out at the gray sky.

Lynn arrived home, drenched by the storm and wanting to change out of her wet clothes. Shutting her door, she walked across the day room and found herself staring out the window at Starfleet Headquarters. Her thoughts wandered to Will and his case, and it made her pause for a moment. How odd it seemed that no one had made any connections to his abuse in his files to his almost reckless behavior that he had shown early in his career. Lynn had a few friends in Starfleet Intelligence and she would ask them to make discreet inquiries about Will, his father and see if anything interesting turned up. A feeling came over her and she paused, not knowing what to make of it. It was something of an attraction to Will, and she didn't know how to proceed from that, almost unknown sensation. That troubled her thoughts as she continued to gaze out into the dreary sky.

It was close to 5 AM when he woke abruptly, his thoughts racing along with his pulse. “Damn....” he swore, sitting up in the dark bedroom. He started having the nightmares of Kyle again, and he hated it. Long ago, it was Jean-Luc who would soothe him back to sleep, holding him until he fell asleep once more. Now, there was no one who could help him through these nightmares anymore. He left the room and walked into the living room, not able to go back to sleep. His thoughts once again drifted to Lynn and he smiled softly, remembering her gentle caring eyes. Sitting there, he thought about their next meeting as the soft hues of the morning sky began to show in the bay window. He wondered if perhaps he had found someone to share those deep, dark secrets in his soul and even more so, a second chance to love again.

Lynn woke, her thoughts hazy and sat up on the edge of her bed. She yawned and stretched, trying to wake up. Rising, she walked into her bathroom and grimaced at her reflection in the mirror. There were a few fine lines around her eyes that she hadn't noticed before and a line or two around her mouth. Shaking her head, she undressed and stepped into the sonic shower. Lynn's thoughts once again drifted back to Will and his rather unusual case. Programming a quick cycle, she thought about him, and felt that sense of attraction again. “Just like that, falling for a senior officer..like mom did. See what it got her...” Lynn muttered, as the cycle shut off. But in her heart, it felt _DIFFERENT_ than anything else. Could it be that Will was the one she was so desperately trying to find...someone to love her for all of her faults?


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will has an update from Admiral Akaar and starts the grieving process for his eldest son, Sacha. He contacts Lynn, in hopes of her counseling him on what to tell the others, Rose and Jean-Guy. Will also hopes that Lynn feels the same way about him as he feels about her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah love.....will it bite him in the butt or will Lynn admit she feels the same about him? Here's hoping that these two can finally start to drift into each other on a more personal level.
> 
> Let me know your thoughts, feelings, disgust, etc....I won't bite...or work you into my next death story, I promise!

The meeting was very long, and Will tried to keep from yawning in the middle of it. The Vice-Admiral from Starfleet Marines was still talking after a good hour and a half on the state of some sector or another. Others that had attended were looking like they really shouldn't have come, but rather had sent some member of their staff in their place. Will glanced down at one of the padds he had brought with him and tried not to look too annoyed at the long-winded Admiral. Akaar soon brought the meeting back under his control, as the speaker finally sat down, much to the relief of all those attending. “We have nothing else to report on the loss of the Titan, but the team will remain in her last location to see if anything else can be found.” Akaar said, with a glance in Will's direction. “If they are unable to either find her or traces of her, than reluctantly we must declare her a loss and start informing the families of the deceased immediately.” The rest of the staff glanced quickly at Will, who sat there, as a flicker of pain and grief crossed his face. The Admiral was quiet for a moment and then stood, the rest of the staff, save Will rose to their feet. “Dismissed”.

Akaar remained as the others filed out, leaving him alone with William in the conference room. “Will..If they don't find him, I'm deeply sorry. We tried everything to find him and the Titan. I too, have lost children in the service to Starfleet.” He said, as Will slowly got up from his chair. Will could only nod and turned away from the table, his thoughts heavy with the grief he felt. Akaar smiled a bit and then went to his side, and placed a gentle hand on Will's shoulder. “You're not needed today, go home and return in a few days. I'll have your aide handle the correspondence and reports.” Will nodded and with a sad, small smile left the room for his apartment. 

Will got into the 'lift and directed it to the main level, his thoughts turning to his son and what he would have to tell his other two children. But Lynn came across his mind and he knew that he needed to see, if not talk to her again. Will didn't really know what to tell Rose and Jean-Guy about what happened to their older brother Sacha. He could give them the same explanation that he always had to give to other grieving families, but it was different this time. This time, it was his own family that he had to deliver bad news to. A lot of sibling jealousy had been between Sacha and Jean-Guy, each being the other parent's favorite child. Rose, on the other hand, had been both his and Jean-Luc's favorite one. The boys really didn't care either way about that. Sighing, he would tell them in a holoconference and hoped it would go smooth. Rose was so busy with her family and the research she was doing, he hated the thought of her leaving them and coming to Earth to be with him. They had no real reason to hold a funeral, much less a memorial. All of that would be handled with a public memorial for all of the _Titan_ officers and crew at a later date. But his need to see Lynn again was both personal and official. He hoped that she would consent to see him, and at least talk with him. A feeling of panic started to come over him and he fought it down, not wanting to give in to that old feeling once again. Will had enough of having panic attacks, thank you. After the 'lift deposited him on the main level, he walked over to one of the Senior Officer's private lounges and sat in front of a communications terminal that was there,punching in the code for Lynn's office. Her head nurse answered and took his message that he wanted to see her later in the day for a conference. Finishing that task, he signaled the wait staff for a cup of very strong Raktajino to get him through the rest of the morning.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lynn meets up with Will and they start to better aquatint themselves with each other. They talk about his career and how she can possibly help him both with the loss of his son. She agrees to meet him, because she's intrigued by him and he's also intrigued with her. Will flirts and eases the tension that had come up between them in an earlier meeting. The attraction between them is growing, but will they heed their hearts or their heads?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Even he's approaching 110 (or so) Will's still got it.....But I figured that since his mom was Native American, he wouldn't show his age really bad. In my story, he still looks like he's in his early 70's...so hopefully that won't be a problem to you, my dear readers. 
> 
> He flirts with her and she teases him back....but there are storm clouds brewing that may end up threatening their relationship....what that is, you'll just have to find out in the next three chapters....

Lynn walked out of the surgical suite from performing emergency surgery on an ensign who had managed to get an acute case of appendicitis. She sighed and did her rounds in Sickbay, stopping by Maternity to see about the two new mothers and check in on some research she had authorized on Tyllerian measles. Two hours later, she was walking back to her office when her head nurse informed her of Admiral Riker's call. Lynn went into her office and pondered her next move. Will had been on her mind today and with good reason. Her friends in Intelligence wasn't able to get her any further information on what happened between Will and his father or what Section 31 (which came up in the reports filed by Dr Crusher and Dr McBride) had to do with his state of health, mentally and physically. All of that had been put under a level of security that even they couldn't get past. This disturbed her and it complicated the plan of treatment she had been forming. Lynn punched in the code that Will had left for her to contact him and waited for a few seconds as the connection was made. But a stray thought crossed her mind and she quickly dismissed it for the moment. She couldn't let her personal, private thoughts about the admiral interfere with her professional thoughts. The monitor started to form Will's image and she steeled herself for the conversation, hoping that he didn't notice the nervousness she felt both inside and out.

The screen showed Will sitting in a slightly darken corner of a room, and with a half-full cup of Raktajino in front of him. “Sorry that it took me a bit to return your message. I was in Emergency Surgery. Is there anything I can do for you, Admiral?” Lynn asked, giving him a smile. Will nodded and flash a brief smile of his own. “Is there a way you could meet me outside of Sickbay for a few moments? I promise, it won't be too long.” She nodded, a bit relieved at the offer. “Yes, where are you at? I could be there in about ten minuets.” He smiled, the years briefly gone from his face.”I'm on the main level, the Senior Officers Lounge.....I'll see you then.” Lynn terminated the connection and sat back in her chair for a few moments, thinking. His record was outstanding, and there were a few blemishes here and there, but for the most part he was one of the very few role models you could find in Starfleet. Some of his tactics were studied and on a few occasions, were replicated by captains. He had turned down an offer to teach at the Academy in advance tactics, much to the dismay of the Commandant and the staff. But it was his personal life that intrigued Lynn the most. His husband had suffered from Irumodic Syndrome and there was no cure for it. It had been a mental and physical strain on him as he watched his husband die, slowly losing the ability to remember even the most simplest of things. They had three children, Sacha, Rose, and Jean-Guy who were the only things that kept him going after Jean-Luc's death some years before. But Will had never remarried, which was strange to her. Anyone, male or female would have been happy to have his attention. But he remained a widower, and rarely saw anyone for company. That saddened her, for she could tell there was a lot of hurt still over losing Jean-Luc and now his oldest child. He needed someone to talk with, perhaps even to laugh with.

Lynn rose from her desk and smoothed her hair with her hand, nervous at meeting him. She took off her lab overcoat and draped it on the back of her chair, and left her office. Taking the 'lift down to the main level, she thought about what she would say and hoped to heaven that she wouldn't sound like an idiot. Of all the patients that she had treated in the past, he was the one she was most keenly attracted to. There had been one in the past who she fell in love with, and almost left Starfleet for. But her head overruled her heart in that particular one, since the patient turned out to be a Vulcan from one of the important families. She wouldn't have been happy in that relationship, so she was grateful that he left and bonded with another Vulcan, who his family had selected for him years earlier. The doors snapped open and she walked down the wide promenade, she found the lounge and after pausing for a moment, walked in. The lights were down a bit, not too much where you couldn't see where you were going, but low enough to reflect the mood of calmness. Glancing around, she saw Will in the corner watching the various ships in space-dock either being repaired or prepping to leave for some sector or another. “Wish you were on one of those, Admiral?” Will turned and saw Lynn standing there, smiling. He smiled back, motioning for her to take the chair across from his. “No, Doctor....that's for the young. I don't think I could handle being back out there, not at my age.” Will replied, turning his attention back to Lynn, who sat there watching him. “I gave that part of my career up, over twenty-five years ago. Chose to remain close to Earth...close to the ones I loved. You? How did you end up here, stuck on some Starbase, with grumpy old Admirals for patients?” She laughed as the waiter came over for her order. “Actually, I don't mind grumpy old Admirals for patients. They become meek lambs once I'm finished with them.” Lynn replied, as she gave her order to the waiter for an Acturian Fizz Water.

“Oh, so we become like lambs after you've finished poking and prodding? That's not what a friend of mine once told me. She said that they become like little boys who don't want to stay still for a moment longer. Always squirming, trying to find a way out of their situation.” He said, leaning slightly forward in his chair. “You must be talking about Dr Beverly Crusher. She was one of my instructors at Med School and also one of my supervisors during my clinical rotations. I always wanted to follow in her footsteps, but after experiencing my starship rotation, I decided that it wasn't the place for me.” Lynn said softly as the waiter brought her the fizz water. She glanced up to see that he was watching her closely, his blue eyes sympathetic and kind. Her heart leaped a bit, but she kept her composure calm. “I understand....you know you can call me Will. I don't usually stand for formality with my doctors.” Will said, taking a sip of his now-cold Raktajino and making a slight face. Lynn laughed again and signaled the waiter, who came over with another cup of Raktajino for him. “You know that stuff is gosh awful when it's the least bit cold....Will.” She said, blushing slightly and hoping that he wouldn't notice. Nodding, he took a sip and glanced back out at the space-dock and sighed softly. “Never wanted to be an Admiral, Lynn...it was forced on me. I wanted to stay out there, but others thought it would be better for me to be here. I hate it...I just hate it.” Will looked over at Lynn, who smiled a small smile and took a sip of her fizz water. “You're cute when you blush..... _Doctor_.” Lynn felt the heat from her blush creep up to her ears and Will just smiled that beautiful smile. He hesitated a bit but reached across the table and gently laid his hand on hers. “I wasn't kidding, Lynn. You are very cute when you blush. I hope that you don't take offense at that.” She shook her head and looked into his eyes, and felt her heart skip a bit. “No offense taken, Will. I just hope that I can be of some help to you...now and in the future.” Will nodded and kept his hand on top of hers, feeling that spark of hope igniting once again somewhere in his soul and heart. _Finally_ he thought, gazing into Lynn's eyes _I found someone who will understand...someone who could help me live again._ She met his gaze and knew that this was no ordinary patient, that she may have found the one that she had been waiting for so long to come into her life. 

They sat there quietly for a few moments and just enjoyed each others company in silence. “Will....Have you contacted your other children about Sacha yet? If you haven't, please do so as soon as you can. They have the right to know what happened to him. I'll be there when you do that is, if you want me to.” Lynn spoke, her voice soft. “I've had to contact family members and it's not something that should be done alone. It's heartbreaking to tell someone that their parent, child, or spouse won't be coming back.” Will nodded and squeezed her hand, grateful for the offer of support. “Thanks, Lynn.....I'd appreciate the support. I just don't know what to tell them...I'm able to write a killer report on some sector or whatever, make or break someone's career with an evaluation, but I don't know what to tell my kids.” He shook his head and the look in his eyes cut into Lynn. There was pain and something else reflected that she just couldn't tell. She smiled and tried to project a sense of calm. Her own thoughts were in a state of turmoil and she didn't want to anger him with the wrong response to his unspoken question.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They continue to talk about their work and how she can help him with the surviving kids. During a part of the conversation Lynn thinks she's made a blunder, but Will tells her she didn't. Will invites her to his place for dinner and she agrees, but someone else in the lounge is looking on and beginning to plot revenge on Admiral Riker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here are the storm clouds beginning to form.......and they share some romantic time together....

Will glanced at Lynn who sat there, a sad look in her eyes as she didn't know what to tell him. “It's not your fault, Lynn. I'm projecting again and making a mess of everything right now.” Lynn held his hand firmly in hers as she spoke. “I'm here as a friend as well as your doctor. Whatever you are going through, you have me to help you. Always remember that, Will. I'm always available to meet with you, talk or whatever. This is something that we can do together to get you past this.” Will's vision blurred as the tears started forming in his eyes. He blinked, hoping that she didn't see them and grateful for the low light in the lounge. She looked down at the table in silence, embarrassed that she had brought the whole painful subject up. “Will...I'm sorry that I mentioned this to you. I've spoiled our time together...I'd better go...” Lynn started to rise from her chair, confused and angry at herself. Will held her hand and she looked at him, torn between her emotions at what had happened and her need to leave before she made a fool of herself. “Don't go, Lynn. You didn't do anything wrong...believe me...you didn't.” He said, giving her a sad smile. “I'm just so confused at what to say, what to do now....it wasn't anything you said or did. Please, stay....”

She nodded and relaxed, her own eyes blurring with the tears that she refused to shed in front of him. Reaching out, she took a sip of her fizz water and smiled back at him. “My shift is over for now. Perhaps you might be interested in having something for an early dinner?” Lynn asked Will, who relaxed a bit now that he knew she wouldn't leave him here at the mercy of his own raw emotions and the sadness he felt inside. “I do cook, Lynn. My apartment isn't far away from here, if you would like something that's really cooked, not from a replicator.” He replied, watching her for a reaction. “Sure, Will. That would be great. I haven't had anything really cooked in a long time. Always getting my food from a replicator....gets pretty dull after a while.” Lynn rose to her feet as Will did. They walked out of the lounge, chatting about where each of them grew up and the usual safe chit-chat. Passing by several other Admirals at one of the tables near the door, one of the admirals gave Will a rather dirty look to which he ignored. There were a few on the Admiralty that didn't like Will being among them, they had accused Akaar of have favorites and that Will was one of them. This one, Admiral Stevens, had made a few passes at Lynn who all but ignored him. Stevens was furious that she had resisted his overtures at her and now she favored Riker over him. He sat there, half-listening as the others were complaining about their sectors thinking about how to deal with Riker barging in on his prize, the prize being Lynn Hawthorne as his mistress.

They left the building and walked the distance to his apartment building, talking about her being from Old Salt Lake City and him from Valdez. The sun was soon to start setting, and the air was crisp and getting cooler. “Mm..winter is almost here. Wonder if Weather Control will let it snow this year. Would be nice if they did.” Will said, walking alongside Lynn. She nodded and glanced at the trees in the small park they passed. “Yes, it would. I used to play in the snow when I was a child. Mom would get so mad at me for trampling snow into the house.” Will laughed and Lynn smiled, knowing that she had gotten him out of his dark mood. “My dad used to do the same to me. Yell at me for bringing in snow from outside, the usual things a parent would yell at their kids for doing. But I still did it anyway.” He said, smiling at her with that gorgeous smile of his. They got closer to the building and the sun began to set, throwing a warm glow over everything and deepening shadows started to form. A cool wind began to blow and Lynn shivered slightly. Will slipped his arm around her and drew her a bit closer to him. She smiled and blushed slightly at their contact. _Don't go falling for him_ She thought as they got closer to the main doors to the building. _Remember that you are a professional, not some love-struck Ensign. He's old enough to be your father or worse!_

Will steered her into the building and they made their way to the 'lifts, talking about what he needed to tell the kids about Sacha. “Don't make it sound too impersonal, Will. They will be in shock and disbelief for a while. This is their brother they lost....they will be upset, I'm sure.” She said as the 'lift ascended to his apartment. “I know, Lynn. It's just that I don't know what to tell them...Hell....I don't know all of the reasons the ship was lost myself. If I don't know, then what in the hell to I tell the kids?” Will replied, hurt in his voice. The doors snapped open and they walked down the hall to the apartment door. He motioned her in first, and he closed the door behind him. She stood there in the living room, marveling at the sheer size of the place. “My apartment is nothing like this.....you could fit it in this living room area!' Lynn exclaimed, her eyes wide. Will smiled and shrugged his shoulders a bit, the anger and despair leaving him. “One of the perks of being an admiral, I guess. Jean-Luc and I decided to have this place as well as our home in Stirges. That way, if he or I had to be here in San Francisco we would have a place to stay that was ours. I moved here after he died twenty years ago...the other place was too quiet for my tastes. The kids were gone, so there was no reason to stay there.” He said, walking into the kitchen area. Lynn followed him, her expression was of awe of the place he called home. “But you do need to let some light in, Will. You just can't sit in the near-dark forever. There has to be some light in here, now and again.” She replied, as he dug into the cold storage for some salmon fillets he had. Will turned around and looked directly at her, his eyes never leaving hers. “There is light in here, Lynn. It's you....you're the light. You always have been, you always will be.” He said, his voice as soft as the wind they had encountered outside. Lynn could only stand there as he slowly walked towards her, a gentle smile on his lips. She didn't know what to say but as he got closer to her, she dropped her eyes embarrassed at the feelings she had inside for him. Will reached out and gently raised her chin, gazing into her eyes, seeing what she dared not speak out loud but what was in her heart. He leaned in and kissed her gently. She responded to his kiss, as he slipped his arms around her. The sun dipped far below the horizon as Will and Lynn had dinner and sat together on the couch, talking late into the night.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will and Lynn wake in their respective places, each thinking about the other. Lynn hurries to get ready and go surprise Will at his apartment for breakfast. She doesn't see that there is a message for her from Admiral Nathaniel Stevens, who is pursuing her as his mistress. Lynn surprises Will, who in turn makes his feelings for her known. She gives in to the feelings that have been stirring in her heart and soul, since they first met. But will Admiral Stevens drive them apart? Lynn is fearful that he will do something rash to either her or Will, if not now perhaps in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...now it's starting to get really, really interesting......but I won't spill the beans, dear readers....

Will woke after sleeping for a few hours without any nightmares for the first time in many years. Lynn had been wonderful to talk to, and they had talked well into the night, on various things and that had been very pleasant. He had learned that her parents never married, but she wasn't bitter about that. Her father had been an Admiral, but could never settle on just one woman. Lynn's mother found out that he had at least four other children with at least three women alone. That enough was to make Lynn re-think about getting serious with anyone. _Damn...and I thought that I was bad at being in relationships.._ Will thought after Lynn divulged that to him. Will even told her about Deanna and their relationship before they met again on the Enterprise-D, when he became Jean-Luc's First Officer. She had listened to him, aware of the memories that came rushing back to him and how those memories were a part of how he managed to survive everything that had happened to him since. Lynn had left to return to her own apartment sometime near 2 AM, and he regretted that he didn't ask her to stay with him. But he figured that they both needed to take everything slow for the moment. He had all but assured her that he would never had treated her or any other woman like her father treated her mother. Lynn had been relieved to hear that and they spent the evening being comfortable with each other.

Lynn sat up in her bed after the alarm went off, thinking about Will and the evening they had together. He had wanted her to stay, but for her sake he didn't ask her. That was a relief, but also a disappointment too. She had seen the need in his eyes for companionship, but he didn't want to rush her. Lynn smiled and stretched for a moment, already thinking about meeting him again. _Wonder if he would mind if I came by for breakfast?_ She thought, going into the bathroom for her morning shower. After a quick shower, she was dressed and heading out the door for Will's apartment hoping to surprise him with an offer to fix breakfast. She didn't notice the signal light on her private terminal flashing as she left, but knew who it was from and ignored it. A message had been left for her by Admiral Stevens, who had been trying to snare her as his mistress. It was for her to meet him this morning before the Admiralty morning meeting. Quickly making her way to the public transporter terminal, she programmed Will's building code in and stepped onto the pad. A few moments later, she stepped off the terminal pad inside the building. Lynn walked over to the 'lift and the doors swooshed open. Riding the 'lift she hoped that Will was still home and hadn't left for his office yet. Once the 'lift stopped on his floor, she had to keep herself from running down the corridor to his door. 

She pushed the button for the chime and waited for a few moments, trying to calm herself down. The door opened and Will's face brightened when he saw who his visitor was. He reached out and took her hand, drawing her into the apartment and closing the door behind her. “Lynn....” He said softly, drawing her into a kiss that shook her to the core. “I missed you.....I wanted to see you again...I didn't think you'd mind if I came over...” Lynn managed to stammer, her hand still in Will's. Will smiled and drew her even closer to him, his eyes sparkling with a touch of humor. “No, Lynn...I don't mind it at all. I was going to come to you, anyway. I too, wanted to see you again. Did you enjoy our dinner last night?” He asked, gently kissing her again. “Yes, Will I did. I do regret not staying, but I didn't want to rush things. I was hoping you'd understand.” She said, slipping her arms around him as he did, likewise. “Oh I do understand, Lynn. It's been awhile since I've been with anyone. I am out of practice, I guess.” Will remarked as Lynn laughed quietly. “You're doing just fine, Will.” She replied as they kissed again.

They broke apart and Will led her into the living room, the curtains opened for once and the light from the sun filling the room. “You did tell me that I had to let the light in...and so I have, with you coming into my life.” He remarked as they stood in front of the bay window, the light pouring in. “Yes, I did....I'm glad that I am able to be that light in your life. But...” She paused, not wanting to spoil the mood. Will turned to her as she chewed her lower lip. “What's wrong, Lynn? Is it the age difference or something else?' Will asked, concern in his eyes. “It's Admiral Stevens....He's been chasing me for some time now. I saw him as we were leaving the lounge yesterday. H's been harassing me, sending me messages, trying to get me to become his mistress. I've tried to ignore him, but it's getting worse. I don't want him to do something to you, Will. He does have seniority and I don't think Admiral Akaar is unaware of his intentions, but I don't know how to approach him about Stevens.” She continued to stare out the window, avoiding Will's gaze. “As for the age difference, it doesn't matter. You don't look your age....most men would kill to know your secrets. My guess is the Native American part from your mother.” Will laughed and pulled her into his arms. “Yes, unfortunately that's true. She never looked her age even when she and my father were dating. People accused him of dating a minor for a while, until they found out that my mom was Native American. Then they left them alone.” Lynn smiled, hoping that he wouldn't see the fear in her eyes. “Don't worry, Lynn. Stevens won't hurt you or me, OK?” Nodding, they kissed and Will stepped back from her. “How about some breakfast, before we get ahead of ourselves?” She smiled and nodded her agreement. “Sounds good, I'm off for the next three days..Department head's privilege and also because I had to work my days off last week.” “Good....because I have a feeling neither one of us will be leaving this place anytime soon.” Will smiled and Lynn slipped her arms around him, giving him her brilliant smile. “Sounds good to me, Will.” She kissed him and released him, heading into the kitchen with him behind her.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will and Lynn have a relaxing breakfast together and talk about her career, and her parents. Will tells her a few things about his experiences on the Enterprise-D and the frustration he feels at Headquarters. The sparks between them are fanned to an open flame as they give in to their hidden desire for each other. Meanwhile, Nathaniel Stevens is furious at Riker and Lynn for their new-found relationship and he starts to plot Riker's demise from Starfleet, in order to pursue his quest of Lynn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Will had insisted that he fix breakfast, in which Lynn agreed that he was the better cook. They quickly forgot about Stevens and laughed as Will told her some of the humorous things that had happened on the Enterprise. “Wow....so this huge space baby thought the ship was it's mother? How did you get it to detach from the ship?” Lynn asked as she watched Will fix the omelets. “Geordi and Dr Brahms changed the power ratio so that it wasn't compatible with its own. They 'weaned' it from the ship with no damage to us or the life form.” He replied, plating the food. She shook her head and smiled. “Sounds like you had the dream job that most people never get to have, Will. Most of the ones I see transfer into Medical have washed out of the Command path and don't want to go into Security or Engineering. They have high hopes to be able to stomach what I see on a daily basis and also to remain in Starfleet. The desk jobs are few and far in-between.” Will nodded and walked over to the table, handing her the plate. “I should know about desk jobs, Lynn. I've got one of the most boring ones they could find for me. Reviewing requisitions, reports....it's driving me crazy.” Lynn reached out and gently took his hand in hers, concern showing on her face. “I'm here, Will. Please remember that, my love.”

He smiled and it showed in his eyes. “Thanks, Lynn....I just need to hear that I'm still wanted..it's been hard these past twenty years...” She smiled and squeezed his hand, the warmth of her smile reassuring Will. “Just eat your breakfast, Will. We'll have time to talk later about everything....about us, and the future.” “Yes, darling.” With that, they picked up their forks and started eating the omelets, along with the fresh fruit that he prepared as well. Will asked her about her mom and what led her to Starfleet Medical. “My mom was resistant to me joining 'Fleet, but I told her that it was the only thing that interested me. Oh I could have gone to one of the civilian Med Schools, but it wouldn't have been the same. Here, I can come into contact with other races that I had only heard about from my dad. I could actually help some of them. There are a few that ran into trouble with falling birthrates, and with a few others managed to find a rare gene issue they didn't even knew they had. Mom was kinda xenophobic, but got over it. She had never left Earth her entire life, so she was afraid of other races even the Vulcans spooked her to some extent.” She said, taking a bite of her strawberries. Will was surprised that there were some people xenophobic to other races still. Lynn shook her head and sighed. “I guess mom was scared after the Xindi attacks...I don't know. She would be surprised that I'm talking with the one who helped defeat them.” She laughed softly and glanced at Will who smiled. “I wasn't the only one, Lynn. There were several others who helped plan the whole thing.” He replied, picking up their now-empty plates and walking to the sink. “True, but it was YOU who led the attack on the main ship. The _Titan_ was yours at the time. So Starfleet and the Federation Media credited you with the victory.”

Smiling softly, Will walked over to her and reached out for her hand. She rose from the table, gently kissed her and led her into the living room. They sat on the couch and Lynn snuggled next to him, hearing his strong heartbeat as she laid her head on his chest. Will slipped his arms around her and they sat there in the quiet of the room, savoring the moments they had together. Both knew that their relationship would be tested, both from within and from without. But somehow they knew that they would be strong and nothing would tear them apart. Lynn relaxed and felt in her heart that Will WAS the one she had been desperately trying to find, in all of her relationships. He would help her to feel safe and secure again. Will's thoughts were no longer dark and brooding, now that Lynn had come into his life. He felt safe again, as if all of the terrible things that had happened to him after his mother died never really occurred. It was as if it had been a dream, a terrible nightmare that he finally woke up from. 

She stirred and glanced up at him, a troubled look in her eyes. “Will, what's wrong?” Will glanced down at her, a smile on his lips. “Nothing, my love...just thinking and enjoying the fact that you're here.” “Oh..” She replied softly, blushing slightly. Leaning down they kissed, and the intensity of that kiss grew. She turned around to face him and pulled his head down to hers, their tongues danced around each others. His hands moved down her back and up again, his passion evident for her. Lynn sat up and while watching him, undid her shirt slowly. Will's eyes locked with hers, as he sat back and watched her tease him as she removed it. Reaching out, he gently slipped her bra straps from her shoulders and tugged the bra softly down from her breasts. She reached behind her back and undid the clasp, letting it fall to the floor. Her breasts were firm and the nipples rigid from her desire. Leaning forward a bit, he tenderly took one of her nipples in his mouth, sucking on it softly as she whimpered low in her throat. His hands slipped to her skirt and he slipped it up, reaching to rest one of his hands on her thigh. A moan escape from her and he stirred against her, his own desire mounting. He let go of her nipple, and whispered “We'd better take this elsewhere....my love. I don't think that this couch can hold both of us..” Lynn nodded and took his hand, leading him to the bedroom.

In the soft light, she turned to him and undid her skirt, stepping out of it and her panties. She reached for him and helped him out of his clothes, gently stroking his chest as his hands slipped down touching her everywhere. Will kissed her throat, and made his way to her left shoulder with tiny kisses as she shuddered with the sensations they made. He paused for a moment and then made his way back across to her right shoulder, again with the tiny kisses. His hands roamed down to her nipples, as he gently pinched them. Her soft whimpers echoed in the quiet of the room, along with her increased breathing. He played with them, pinching and gently pulling on them before his hands dropped even lower. Will slipped one arm around her and his other hand slipped between her thighs, caressing her soft skin there. “Please....don't tease me.....oh god.....I want you so badly, my darling...” She whimpered, her voice betraying the desire she felt inside. “Yes, my love....Oh yes.....” Will whispered back as his fingers started to stroke her clit. A shudder ran through her as he slipped two fingers inside of her and found her to be already wet and ready for him. He gently began to finger fuck her as she started to keep pace with the thrusts of his fingers. She clung to him as the pace began to go faster and her juices were running down her inner thighs. Her moans were getting louder and he kept up the pace of the thrusts, watching her slowly go crazy from the sensations. “Oh God.....faster, Will....please....oh god...oh god......” Lynn said, clutching Will tightly. He rammed his fingers into her and with a final, furious thrust Lynn came hard and fast. Shuddering, her body went limp and Will caught her before she hit the floor. He held her as they sat there on the floor, while she caught her breath. “You OK?” Will quietly said, as her breathing slowed down somewhat. Lynn nodded and looked up at him. “Yes...I'm OK....sorry if I scared you...” She blushed and lowered her eyes. “You didn't, Lynn. I'm just glad that you enjoyed it.” Will said, brushing a stray stand of hair from her forehead. She leaned into him, her heartbeat slowing down to normal again. “I don't think we're done yet.” Lynn gently stroked his shaft, keeping her eyes on him. He smiled and relaxed as she got on her knees and kept up the pace of her strokes. “Yes, darling...oh yes....fuck...feels good.” Will whispered, his voice getting husky as she increased the pace. She leaned down and flicked her tongue over the head, tasting the pre-cum that had leaked out.

Will closed his eyes as she took him in her mouth and began to suck him, each time going deeper into her throat. Gently he placed his hand on her head, to help guide her in her mouth work. Shifting slightly over, she allowed him access to her clit which he started stroking gently. A muffled moan came from her as she continued to take him deeper into her throat, going faster and faster with her movements. “Come for me, Lynn. Don't hold back, just allow yourself to come.” He whispered as he increased the strokes on her clit, which was swollen with her desire. Will kept guiding her mouth with his other hand, sometimes holding her head down when she took him all the way in her throat. He felt himself nearing the edge and knew that soon he would explode. Lynn felt it as well, working her hand and mouth on him at a faster pace. “Swallow it, Lynn...swallow it all...” She briefly nodded and with one final, hard thrust, Will came inside her mouth and she struggled to swallow it all. Hot and salty, it poured out and down her throat and somehow she managed to not lose a drop of it. She raised her head, gasping for breath and swallowing what little was left in her mouth. There was a slight bit on the corner of her mouth and she wiped it up with a finger, licking it clean. Will rose to his feet, a bit shaky and offered his hand to Lynn. He guided Lynn to the massive bed and slipped her into it. She watched as he climbed in beside her and slipped into his arms. Tired and exhausted from their explosive love making, they soon drifted off to sleep in each others arms.

Admiral Nathaniel Stevens wasn't a man who one fooled with and won. He was furious that Will had managed to woo Lynn away from him and he would soon find a way to get her back. Of course, Lynn wasn't his to begin with but he was bound and determined to have his way. Lynn didn't return his message nor did she report in for work, her head nurse said that she was taking a few days off along with her normal off-days because of having to work four weeks straight without any time off. He stormed out of Sickbay and located her apartment in the old quarter of San Francisco, but when he tried to comm her, she didn't answer. Leaving another message, he went to the morning meeting in a foul mood. But one of the snags in all of his plans, was that he was still married and his wife wasn't about to divorce him anytime soon. He always had an eye for the fairer sex and Lynn had attracted him soon after she first arrived at her new post. She was far more beautiful than the previous doctor, who was a joined Trill. Stevens had noticed that Will was absent from the meeting and Akaar wasn't bothered by it. Bored by the meeting, he sat there and thought about his revenge on Will. Of course everyone knew that he had married his captain, Jean-Luc Picard some twenty years ago or so, and had three children. One of them had been on the _Titan_ when she was presumed lost. The other two, he didn't know or cared where they were. He finally reasoned that there was no point in bringing up that Will married a man, which by the 24th Century, no one cared who married who and their gender anymore.

He thought about finding something in Will's service record, but there again, it was common knowledge what he did in his career. His saving the Federation not only twice from the now-dead Borg but from a rather vicious Xindi attack on Earth was widespread and he was considered a hero. Stevens had escaped Earth, thinking that the Federation was doomed. He ran, while several thousand members of Starfleet and many more private citizens had perished in the attack. “Too bad Akaar wasn't one of them who died..” Stevens thought as he watched Akaar at the head of the table. “I would have been his replacement. Then we would be in much better control of the Romulans and those weak allies, the Klingon Empire.” He glanced at a few of the others who sat near him, who avoided his gaze and tried to avoid any contact with him. Stevens had few friends on the Board, they all knew (including Riker) that his ambitions were deadly.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nathaniel Stevens tries to find out information on Will in order to destroy him and regain Lynn. Akaar steps up his security net around Stevens in order to protect Will and Lynn from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stevens is a bit off his rocker, don't you think?? :)

Stevens pretended to be interested, but rather he was bored and angry at Lynn who had spurned him and especially at Riker who stole her away from him. The meeting finally wrapped up and he waited until Akaar had almost left the room to speak with him. “I didn't see Will here today.” Nathaniel tried to sound concerned about Will's absence. “He's taking a few days off, Nate. I told him to go back to Stirges and talk with the kids about the _Titan_. His assistant is taking care of things while he's gone.” Akaar said, knowing full well that Stevens hated Will. But Nathaniel didn't notice Akaar's scrutiny. “Oh...if that's the problem, I guess we can get along without him for a few days. I have a report that needs his input on, I'll drop it off at his office later.” Nate said, giving Akaar a smile and walked out the door. Akaar contacted Will's office and told his aide that if anyone asked about Will, he was in Stirges and couldn't be contacted. Will's aide understood what Akaar _didn't_ say and told him that he would take care of anything that came up, needing Will's attention. The entire staff knew of Stevens and his deadly ambitions, and they would do anything to prevent it from happening. At a past meeting Stevens had idly mentioned that the Federation didn't need the Klingons as allies and that they should disregard the Khitomer II Accords, thereby declaring war. Will had argued that Starfleet was in no way ready for such a war, causing the majority of the others to side with him. Stevens was furious that Will had embarrassed him in front of not only the rest of the Admiralty Board, but the Federation President herself. He was known for a long memory and that frightened those who had served under him when he was a Starship Captain. Will had tried to avoid him but on several other occasions, couldn't. Stevens would glare at him from across the conference table and a few of the other Admirals frowned at him, and Will just would return the stare at him. Akaar went to great lengths to keeps Will away from Stevens, and the others on the board secretly approved. Nate was on borrowed time, but either he didn't know it or that he really cared.

Stevens stormed down the hall, his anger at the turn of events was approaching the boiling point. He paused at the door to Will's outer office and after composing himself, entered to find that the aide wasn't in the room. Glancing around, Stevens tried to access the terminal on the desk but found it was locked with the aide's personal code. He then tried to enter Will's office, but the door was locked and he didn't know the code. Swearing, he turned around and left but didn't notice the security monitor had been activated when he came in the outer office. Akaar was watching from his office as he saw Nate trying to get into the terminal and then into Will's office. The lines around his eyes grew taunt and he mentally made a note to have Nate's movements followed and recorded. No one knew how serious the threat of Nate Stevens was than Akaar. Tapping into the terminal, Akaar set up the security net around Nate hoping that it would protect not only Will, but perhaps himself. Word had gotten back to him that Nate wanted to replace him as head of Starfleet, so that he would be able to declare war on just about anyone. That greatly disturbed Akaar, who had been trying to keep peace between the Federation and her Allies for the better part of thirty-odd years.

Nate Stevens returned to his office, and his aide followed him as he sat behind his desk. After handing him several padds, the aide retreated to his desk grateful to be away from Stevens. Nate threw the padds onto the desk and checked for anything from Lynn. Finding nothing, he sent her another message demanding that she contact him immediately. A signal came from his terminal, but it was only his wife who reminded him about some function that they were to attend that night. His wife, who was from a wealthy family, was a social climber and spent money like one drinks water. Of course, it was the money her family had sent her after she married him, with the promise that she would never return. He hated her family, hated her and hated Will all with the same passion. Nate and his wife didn't have any children, after she declared that they would have ruined her figure and she didn't really like them. He decided that Lynn could have a few of his bastard children, providing that she didn't tell then who he was. But convincing her would be a slight problem, but one he could easily take care of. Will would have to be gotten rid of, first and then she would be more than willing to have him, or so he thought. He called for his aide who came almost running into the office. After sending the poor commander on his way, Nate called up the various images of Stirges hoping to be able to pin-point the location of Will's residence there. But he found that the images were a few years old and he had no idea of where to look. Giving up on that particular item, he called up Will's personal records to see if it listen anything in Stirges. It only listed his apartment in San Francisco, and the comm code was unavailable. Gritting his teeth, he swore and shut the terminal down. There seemed no way to find him, and Nate grew angrier. The only ones who knew how to contact him was Akaar and his aide, and there wasn't any way he would ask either one of them without raising some kind of suspicion. While he sat there and pondered his next plan of attack, the security program quietly had collected information on his searches and issued a report to Akaar's terminal. Akaar had read it and he knew that something would have to be done about Stevens and soon. He was becoming a greater threat than anything outside of the Federation that Akaar ever knew. And Will was somehow a focus for Nate's anger and resentment, but Akaar would need more time to find that piece of the puzzle and hopefully it wouldn't be too late to stop Nate from whatever he had planned for Will.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will and Lynn make love again, but their bliss is shattered by Akaar's message to Will about Stevens and they contemplate what he might do next. Akaar is concerned that both Will and Lynn are in serious danger and starts to take steps to prevent a tragedy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy dreading...... :)

Will and Lynn woke as the sun was just beginning to set, the glow of the light in the room was diminishing. Will gently kissed her, lightly stroking her back as she snuggled next to him. “Slept well, my love?” He whispered softly into her hair. Lynn smiled and turned her face upwards to his. “Yes...my darling. And you? How did you sleep?” Her eyes searched his face, inscribing every detail into her memory. “I did....a most restful sleep. I guess because you were in my arms the entire time.” Lynn laughed quietly and kissed him. “Perhaps so,sweetheart. Are you feeling alright? I hope I didn't wear you out.” She said, rising on her elbow to look at him. “No....I feel wonderful, Lynn. Better than I ever had in years. You're the reason for that.” She leaned in and kissed him as he held her tightly to him, the passion rising again. His hands gently caressed her as he lowered her onto her back, a soft sigh came from her throat as he began to kiss down the side of her neck. She shifted slightly as he kissed down to her left breast, gently sucking on the nipple until it had hardened and then moving over to her other breast, sucked on her right nipple. He glanced up at her face, watching her bite her lower lip in anticipation of him. Smiling, he started to kiss down to her bellybutton, swirling his tongue gently around and in it, and then giving her butterfly kisses down to her clit. Lynn squirmed and clutched the sheets, her hips slightly bucking under him as she started to moan a bit louder. Will slipped two fingers into her and slowly began to work them in and out, her juices making a slight squishing noise.

Her hips came off the bed a bit higher, and her knuckles were turning white as he moved his fingers faster and harder in her. “Oh god...oh god...” She whispered, as Will thrust his fingers into her. Will's cock grew hard in anticipation of being inside of her and he kept up the rhythm of his fingers. Lynn moaned louder as the thrusts were taking her close to the edge, and she gasped as Will's tongue lapped at her clit. He sucked on her clit, her juices flowing and his fingers were slick. “Oh my god....don't stop...please don't stop...” Lynn was almost screaming as he kept up the speed of his fingers inside her. Will raised up and with one quick thrust, was deep inside her with his hard cock. She wrapped her legs around him and he thrust deep into her as their tongues danced around each others. Lynn tasted herself and clenched her legs tighter around him, desperately trying to keep him inside her for as long as possible. Will thrusted harder and harder, driven by their needs and he felt himself nearing the edge. “I'm so...close, Lynn....so...close....” He whispered, his voice hard and rough with his desire. “I know, my darling....so....am I” Lynn managed to whisper, her breathing hard and fast. “Cum inside of me....I want it....I need it.....Oh God!” Will slammed into her again and again, not caring if anyone heard them through the walls, only focused on their pleasure. She started to shake with her approaching orgasm, the walls of her vagina clutching him tightly. With a final thrust Will came hard in Lynn, a cry from his throat as he felt her orgasm. She dug her nails into his back, drawing a small amount of blood as she shook from the force of her spasms. They collapsed into a wet, sticky spot on the bed and tried to catch their breath. Her body was still shuddering and he made no attempt to withdraw from her.

Lynn's eyes were closed and her breathing was starting to calm down, her face beaded with sweat. Will kissed her throat and she opened her eyes, still clutching Will close to her. “Sweetheart...” was all she managed to whisper as Will kissed her lips. “Ssh, rest now my love...we have all the time in the world..” He said softly, marveling at how this fragile-looking woman had found her way into his life and his bed. His shaft twitched inside her, and her body responded by holding him tight inside her. Smiling, he brushed her hair from her forehead and traced her jawline with his fingers. Lynn smiled and for once, didn't blush at his touch. They were one, forever linked by their own needs and desires. “Lynn....are you able to have...” Will softly asked but she finished asking the question. “Children?......Yes, I can..” He nodded, a smile on his lips that reached to his eyes. She understood the unspoken question that he was asking of her. “Oh yes, Will...oh god yes...” Nodding, he kissed her as the passion began to rise again within them. Lynn's eyes glowed with the love she felt for him, something that she had denied after meeting him and learning how Will had been mistreated by his own father, his learning how to love again with Jean-Luc's love and how he could trust someone with his heart and soul once more. No longer was he a broken, mistrusting soul but one who was able to love and to be loved by one who knew first-hand those feelings herself. 

She gently ran her hands down his back and felt peace within her own soul. All those feelings of distrust and abandonment were replaced by the love she felt for Will. He gently shifted them to rest facing each other and smiled at one who had his heart. “I don't suppose that it would be asking too much for you to come live with me here, Lynn. There's enough room for both of us, and I doubt anyone would object.” Shaking her head, she smiled and pulled him a bit closer to her. “No, I don't think anyone would. Except for Admiral Stevens....” Lynn hesitated before speaking again.” He'll try to cause us trouble, Will. I'm not sure that even Admiral Akaar can keep him away from us. Then there will be a few who will say that you are 'taking advantage of me'. The usual crap that happens when one is of a higher rank than then other. Like my father was an Commodore of the Fleet and my mom was just a Commander. Their brief romance caused a lot of trouble for both of them. I just don't want that happening with us.” Stroking her cheek, Will thought about Stevens and shook his head. “Akaar knows that Stevens is dangerous, Lynn. He would be a fool if he didn't think that Nate Stevens wouldn't try something...anything at this point. I'm sure that Stevens is under some kind of scrutiny at the present time. Too much has been happening within the upper Admiralty here of late. I've been hearing rumors that Stevens is trying to undermine Akaar and even the Federation President herself.” Lynn had a shocked look on her face. “Dear God....is he crazy?” Will shrugged, and traced a line down her upper arm that made her shiver a bit. “I don't know, Lynn, And something tells me that I don't want to find out.”

Akaar had left his office and headed to his apartment, which was seven floors above Will's,when he started thinking about Stevens again. The man was obviously furious with William, but the question was why? Stevens was one of the most senior Admirals, but had no contact with Will, since Nate was over Starfleet Operations and responsible for the Sixth Fleet and Will's responsibility was over the Ninth Fleet. The 'lift doors snapped open on Akaar's floor and he walked to his apartment door when a thought struck him. One of the other Admirals had said they saw Will talking with Dr Lynn Hawthorne and they had left together. Akaar went inside his apartment and put in a comm call to Will, hoping that he would be home. That had to be the reason that Stevens was angry with Riker....He had heard that Dr. Hawthorne was being chased by a senior staff member, and if what he thought was true then both of them were in serious trouble with Stevens possibly out for revenge. Akaar left a message on Will's terminal and then did the same with Lynn. Of course there was no reason that they couldn't be seeing each other, and officially there was nothing preventing them from doing so. But with Nate being obsessed with Lynn, Akaar worried that Stevens would do both of them serious or even fatal harm.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nate Stevens begins to plan his revenge while Akaar confirms his fears about Will and Lynn being in danger. Akaar warns them, but will it be enough?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmm.........but I'll let you, gentle reader to decide if the warning's enough..or not...

Nate was bored with the reception for some ambassador that his wife dragged him to. He really didn't want to come but she had nagged him for at least an hour before he told her that they would attend. When they had arrived, he was forced to be polite to the ambassador for this boring reception. After the first toast, they were able to mingle with the others who had attended. Thankfully, she had gone to talk with the representative from Betazed so he was able to survey the room. _Weak, useless and pathetic.....that's what these people are. If **I** was head of Starfleet or even as Federation President, they would be crawling on their knees for any favors from me. We would dominate not only Alpha but the Beta and Gamma Quadrants as well. I would crush any and all rebellion against me._ He thought, watching the Andorian and the Klingon representatives talking. _Both Andor and the Klingons would be crushed and forgotten. The Klingons are weak and useless as allies, the Andorians are pathetic, spineless. And the Vulcans should have been eliminated a century ago. Walking computer banks is all they are...._ Nate nodded politely to a couple of fellow Admirals and went back to the bar, and ordered another Old Fashioned from the bartender. He saw his wife frown in his direction, and ignored her. She had become something of a liability to him lately and his thoughts drifted back to Lynn once again. Of course she hadn't returned any of his messages and that infuriated him. Akaar had declined to attend and Nate was glad. He also had plans for Akaar, once he had gotten rid of Riker and then his own wife. Nate allowed his thoughts to drift while he sipped his drink, and ignore the people around him.

Will and Lynn slowly kissed, warm in their bed. “Hungry, my love?” Will asked, holding her close. “Yes, actually I am....but make it something light....perhaps some soup and bread sticks.” Lynn said, with her head on his shoulder. “You really shouldn't eat anything heavy before going to bed.” Laughing softly, Will kissed her forehead. “Yes, _Doctor_. Wouldn't dream of anything too heavy, anyway.” Lynn pretended to be mad, but she started to laugh and soon he joined her. Laughing, they got out of bed and she swiped his shirt and put it on. “Hey.....” He protested lightly, but she smiled and slipped into the bathroom. Shaking his head, he pulled his pants on and went out into the kitchen to start the soup and bread sticks. Half-way to the kitchen, he noticed the message light flashing on his terminal in the office. Will activated the terminal and Akaar's message came up on the screen. “Will....have you seen my.....” She started to say, but saw the look on his face. “What's wrong?” Lynn came around the desk and Will played the message again for her. After it ended, they looked at each other. “Dear god....Stevens **IS** crazy. I can't let him hurt you, Will. I just can't let him.” She whispered, her eyes filling with unshed tears. Will reached out and took her hands in his, squeezing them gently. “He won't hurt me or you, Lynn. I won't let him....Akaar won't let him. Please believe me, sweetheart. You won't have to deal with him anymore, I promise. Trust me with this, OK? Please?” Lynn nodded, afraid at what Stevens might do to Will and her. He stood and enfolded his arm around her and held her, tightly to him. “I swear that he won't hurt anyone....ever again.” Her tears finally won, and she cried softly against his chest. Will held her as her sobs diminished and she sniffled slightly. “I love you, Lynn. Always remember that.....always.”

Akaar tried to relax, but the thought of Nate hurting Will and Lynn kept him from it. He paced his living room, trying to figure out what had gone wrong with Stevens. The man wanted war and he wanted it on his own terms, damn the Federation Grand Assembly or any of the treaties made during the last hundred or so years. Nate hated weakness in anybody and he saw that in many of the races that were in the Federation. Vulcans, Andorians, hell even the Klingons he saw as weak. Akaar's thoughts were in a turmoil, and he was concerned that Nate would act soon against Will and Lynn. His own security programs were uncovering Stevens' actions and the secret alliances that he was making with some of the non-declared allies of the Federation, promising them more territories, whatever they wanted. But of course, Nate wouldn't deliver on those promises and Akaar knew that. Starfleet would be then be dragged into a never-ending war and who knew how many millions would perish at the cost of one man's desire for power. All Akaar could do was to pray to his people's gods and that Will knew of Nate's plans.

Will gently led Lynn out of the office and into the kitchen. Sitting her down, he started the soup, glancing at her from time to time. “I'm OK,Will....It's just so hard to fathom why he's doing this.” She said softly, as he pulled two soup bowls from one of the cabinets. “I think Stevens wants me out of the way. He's a war-monger, Lynn. He wants to start a war that we can't win or get out of. I don't think he understands the consequences that come with it. Hell, I've seen my share and don't want to go through another one. We got off easy the last time, but this time it's all-out war with just about every race in the Federation. The Klingons won't be so easy to defeat, believe me. And he wants you.” Will placed a bowl of soup in front of her. Pulling out the warm bread, he placed them in a basket on the table. She smiled and he sat beside her, picking up his spoon. “It's my mom's recipe for vegetable soup. I've made it a couple of times,but not for just anybody.” Lynn laughed and dipped her spoon into the soup, tasting it. “Mm...it's good...really, Will..it is. Kinda like my mom's but a bit better. She always used way too much black pepper in hers.” He shook his head, smiling at her. “See? I knew you'd feel better after eating something.” Will laughed as she make a mock hurt face. Their laughter was refreshing after getting the disturbing warning from Akaar. But Will had the thought in the back of his mind to keep and eye on Stevens and to protect Lynn from him at all costs. Soon, he realized that it would be a fight but not for the Federation but for his life as well as Lynn's. He knew that he couldn't let his guard down for a second. Once Lynn was safely moved it, would he feel better. Smiling at Lynn, he kept his face composed and his thoughts for once, to himself. _Better that she doesn't know...I don't want her to worry, we have enough to worry about as is.._

Lynn's thoughts went back to Akaar's warning and she couldn't help but be concerned. Stevens would try anything to hurt her and Will, given the chance. The moment that Stevens made his move, Will could be hurt by it and there was no way she would allow that to happen. Their new-found relationship would be tested in the coming days and she knew that it would be no easy fight. Nate was know to play dirty, and there was no telling what he would do or say. The only thing that either one of them could do is to try and not draw any attention to themselves in the mean time. “.....and Mrs Troi was furious that the conference room wasn't decorated like she wanted. Jean-Luc and I had a hard time convincing her that roses and Wisteria didn't go together smell wise.” Will said, as he glanced over at Lynn. “Sweetheart? Are you OK?” Stirring, she smiled at him. “Yes....I was just thinking of the items that I have to move. I've got so much stuff.” He smiled and took their bowls over to the sink, shaking his head slightly. “Just move what you need and the rest can come later. Or we can put them into storage along with the stuff I brought with me from Stirges.” Nodding, she got out of her chair and walked over to him at the sink, slipping her arms around him. Lynn rested her head on his back, listening to his heartbeat as he finished washing the bowls. She had never felt so alive than she did at this moment, here with the one who loved her even with her faults. 

Lynn loosened her grip and Will turned around, smiling at the woman who would dare to love him, a broken man. She leaned in and kissed him, invoking a smile and suddenly she jumped a bit. “Ouch!” Will playfully pinched her, and kissed her back. Taking his hands in hers, she led him out of the kitchen and back to the living room where they curled up on the couch together talking of their future, as the night slowly wore on.

 

_To be continued......._


End file.
